Why is our self worth tied up in our ability to breastfeed?

I see so many people with breastfeeding difficulties agonizing over the loss of that idealized normal breastfeeding relationship. Whatever THAT is. I’ve done it myself.

I’ve also seen people with difficulties think they were failures and that they wouldn’t be able to handle normal breastfeeding. I’m also guilty of that. But I’ve come to realize that what I’m doing, what I’ve done, is harder. I climbed my own Mt. Everest of breastfeeding and I still get jealous of the person with the metaphorical hill in their back yard.

We’re told that breastfeeding is natural. Yes, it is. So is living without electricity, and it’s just as hard. It may be natural, but it doesn’t necessarily come naturally.

Trying to breastfeed in a modern western society that has had the flow of community breastfeeding knowledge interrupted over the past few generations is difficult. No lie. Trying to breastfeed for the first time is difficult regardless. The modern breast is best/normal push is writing cheques that the support systems can’t cash.

And that is not your fault. All you can do is learn, and if you feel brave, try again.

So if you had trouble, even if you didn’t overcome and make it work for you, be proud. What you did was hard and you deserve to be proud, not ashamed.

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